So, it seemed to me that today shared a common element among consumers. It's almost as if they were programmed to think one idea. "MUST GET PINK THING FOR MY VALENTINE!" And like mindless mobs of zombies, they massed throughout the store hoping to fulfill their hunger. Oddly enough, there were no real promotions throughout the store to help celebrate the holiday of Valentine's Day tomorrow. You know, Valentine's Day? That holiday filled with love that was actually based on the martyrdom of multiple Christians who refused to convert themselves to Roman paganists? Oh yeah, now you remember. Gotta love February 14th, eh?
Today seemed to go by pretty rapidly. I was kept busy with a multitude of customers. There was never a dull moment. Why today I even sold $200 worth of headphones to a couple whose ages combined would probably equal how much money I have in my wallet right now. Which I would estimate to be around the $140 range. Yeah, I'm pretty damn surprised too. The only thing I dislike about helping out the older generation is the seemingly endless question they ask me. "Would you mind slowing down? I can't understand what you're saying." Me, slow down? Sure. And why I'm at it, would you like me to grab you a chair? Maybe bring you some hot cocoa and rub your feet? I can even wear a special uniform just to fit your needs... NO! I will not slow down. Look, you come into my store. An ELECTRONICS store, and you want me to slow down? If I speak any slower, things around me will change faster than I'll be able to keep up with. So to keep the whole time/space continuum thing intact, I'm just going to continue at my own leisurely pace. And if that's too fast for you, you can always go to Wal-Mart. Good luck trying to find anyone willing to help you there.
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